It's Sunday. The next week brings in April. Wow. So much has changed.

I've been with him for a little over a month now; a friend of mine whom I thought had disappeared from my life has reappeared and sounds better than ever; my first year at ND is almost over. Wow.

We had his SYR this weekend - pirate themed... it was sooo funny. Next weekend is my dorm's formal, and the theme is "When You Wish Upon a Star", which I think is adorable - my mom is sending me my prom gown from sophomore year (remember that thing? lol) It promises a lot.

However, we had a bit on an incident Friday night at his dance. The exgirlfriend came up to him while I was over hanging out with some of his friends and wanted to talk about something... they were gone for a while and that started to upset me (visions of past experiences come to mind)... anyway, he came back and took me back to the dance floor and apologized for taking forever but that he had to "strongly reprimand someone for being stupid and idiotic" and that he had to "remind her that things are the way they are now and that [I'm] in [his] life now and that's how things are going to stay." So the bitch actually thought that she could find some way back - all of this after trying to get me to be nicer to her by talking about me in front of my friends at the mall, saying that she likes me so much and wishes that I would talk to her too... so yeah, I wasn't too pleased with the fact that I believed her crap and then let her throw it all in my face. Ugh. Idiot. Too bad though - I already won.

Annnnyway... I need to get back to my work. Later everyone. Miss you.

He had me listen to this (don't particularly care for the singer's voice, but the words are, well, fitting...to say the very least *wink*)

"Hands Down" - Dashboard Confessional

Breathe in for luck, breathe in so deep
This air is blessed, you share with me
This night is wild, so calm and dull
These hearts they race from self-control
Your legs are smooth as they graze mine
We're doing fine, we're doing nothing at all.

My hopes are so high that your kiss might kill me
So won't you kill me, so I die happy
My heart is yours, to fill or burst
to break or bury, or wear as jewelry
Which ever you prefer

The words are hush, let's not get busted,
Just lay entwined here undiscovered.
Safe in here from all the stupid questions..
"hey did you get some?"
Man, that is so dumb.
Stay quiet, stay near, stay close
they can't hear, so we can get some.

My hopes are so high that your kiss might kill me
So won't you kill me, so I die happy
My heart is yours, to fill or burst
To break or bury, or wear as jewelry
Whichever you prefer

Hands down, this is the best day I can ever remember
I'll always remember the sound of the stereo,
The dim of the soft lights, the scent of your hair
That you twirled in your fingers
And the time on the clock when we realized it's so late
And this walk that we shared together
The streets were wet and the gate was locked
So I jumped it, and let you in
And you stood at your door with your hands on my waist
And you kissed me like you meant it
And I knew, that you meant it
That you meant it, that you meant it
And I knew that you meant it, that you meant it.

And I'm left rather speechless.

It's Spring Break - I've been home for two days, and I miss people already, but it's nice to be home for a change. I'm surprised that I'm not more upset about being home, but I'm enjoying it for what it is. And I'm glad to know that I'll be back at ND soon. The summer is probably going to kill me.

The past two weeks have been so satisfying, so incredibly wonderful... I still can't believe how things have been working out. But I figure that it was time for something to finally work out in my life after the whole four years of it not working out. I've suffered enough; it was high time for something wonderful to happen. And it's happening right now... not the way I had originally planned it all out years ago - this is a much better version. MUCH better. I miss him... though he's called twice since I've been home and sent me little messages to assure me that he's still thinking about me. Blah... I can't wait to go back.

It's scary to think that these years will bring me relationships in all areas of my life that will most likely last my lifetime. But truthfully, I'm not scared. It's time. It's definitely time.

To someone who is family without the genes:
I know that life has thrown you a huge curveball right now and it's taking a lot of excruciating time to move on. I'm not going to tell you that you're wasting your time and that you should be over this by now, because that's not true nor is it fair. But I will tell you something else - NO ONE is too deserving of you... there are people in this world who don't deserve to kiss the ground you walk on, but there is absolutely no one who is "too good" for you. NO ONE. We all have these periods in our lives where we have to move on even though we don't want to. It's just God's way of pushing us towards something else that He has in mind. Trust me. Please trust me on that one. I've had my share of crap... seriously. Even though you can't see the light at the end of the tunnel yet, it's there... experience this, live it, and then when you get there you can make the most of the experience. I love you and I hope you realize that I hurt with you... I wish I could be there to make it all better, but I can't. But I trust you and I know you'll do what you have to do. :)